calm down, sistah

16 Jun

the inside of my brain, circa 12:23 today

it’s a sunny afternoon. yesterday was a gorgeous day. the past few days have been glorious, warm, bright; i’ve had work to do, and it’s been work that i enjoy; and things are relatively stable on the financial and familial fronts. yet i’ve been feeling increasingly on edge – stomach in gnarled knots, nights plagued by insomnia, body nearly twitching with anxiety, whole self possessed by urge to flee… but why? flee to where? sure, there are some stressful things going on right now, but nothing i can’t handle, and nothing anywhere approaching past stresses i’ve endured. so what gives?

everything either frustrates, annoys, or angers me lately. my patience is at an all-time low, my sense of diplomacy and tact is wearing thin, and the judgmental side of me is operating in overdrive. so i’ve started to go on more walks, in an effort to burn off some nervous energy, and to distract myself with the pleasant smells and colours of late spring. maybe it’s just a sign that i need to keep myself busier. maybe i should take a holiday. maybe i should just lay off the coffee for awhile…

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